Keanuuuuuu. You may have seen this chill af time vampire in his Superbowl ad for Squarespace, standing on top of an actual motorcycle going actually 45 mph down an actual highway because he’s a dedicated bananas person. You may have seen him in the Sad Keanu meme, which is a portion of his Wikipedia page. You may have seen him in your friend’s Neo costume for Halloween (as an aside, unless the theme is Keanu Reeves Roles please don’t actually do this). You may be on board with the theory that he is immortal and is a vampire and/or French actor and doctor Paul Mounet who supposedly died in 1922. (I’m on board, both because 1. look at him 2. may he reign forever) He is a kind, friendly, earnest weirdo who soars best when he gets to hit people and not talk, and I. LOVE. HIM. Not ironically, not just in The Matrix, not just as a joke.